Category
rumination
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05.31.09I HERD YOU LIKEIt's important to make sure that you mute the volume on your computer before picking up the phone, else you lose what little geek cred you have as your friends realize that you're watching Keyboard Cat videos weeks after the meme has lost it's relevancy, although it would be kind of 'cool' (in the Hipster-Runoff-single-quotation-marks-way) to make a meta-Keyboard Cat/Yo Dawg mashup video in which I were being played off while being played off.1 Or something.↩
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04.19.09I THINK I DID OKAY; I’D GIVE MYSELF A 6.Apparently it only takes four years, the euphoria of the unto-then nicest day of the year, the joy of artisanal gelato, a strong whiskey cocktail, and the confidence in one's looks that comes only from a poorly lit room in order to have a strained conversation with someone you've stalked obsessively in the past...and that, my friends, is growth.
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04.17.09DILEMMAS, DILEMMAS.Living life ironically can be a real bitch, like, for example, when you meet up with some dude from Craigslist as a joke and lend him your SECOND copy of V for Vendetta and you realize afterward that he's a bit of a sociopath and then you have to weigh emailing him to get your book back with going to the Video Library to buy more Alan Moore, which would prompt a forty-five minute conversation with a couple of nerds who don't even want to fuck you...like I said: a real bitch.
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08.31.08FRUIT, VEGETABLE–WHO CARES?!It is tomato season and the farmer's market is twice a week but a few blocks away and I know I have a five dollar coupon lurking around here somewhere and I am reminded of how Ramona liked to call them "tommy-toes" (and am totes nostalgic for Beverly Cleary) and there are are peppercorns just waiting to be cracked over thick slices of red and orange joy and I'm starting to salivate with anticipation just a little bit andZOMGNOMNOMNOMINSEASONTOMATOES!!!!1
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05.20.08MY COUNTRY TIS OF THEE.I think if I am ever personally confronted with the ostensible short-comings of my generation, I will widen my eyes in disbelief, furrow my brow in mock concern, lower my voice in full and somberly declare, "We survived 9/11."
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05.18.08JUST LIKE 10TH GRADE.Realizing with glee that there's a new Death Cab for Cutie album early on a Sunday morning makes me a little ashamed and a lot happy.
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04.26.08ENVIRODRUNKS ARE PEOPLE TOO.So if there's a more harmonious union than bacon and chocolate (which there isn't), it's most likely saving the environment and tossing back vodka; the only other drinking-while-green products I have seen are unappetizing wines occupying a lonely shelf at Whole Foods (poor things seemed almost ghettoized, even compared to the paltry local wines section) and a serendipitous mention of green bars I came across while composing this sentence--luckily, my drinking habits are not quite so habitual as to warrant any real time spent on reconciling them with 500-mile or 250-mile or 100-mile nonsense, but I feel for the eco-friendly ...
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04.23.08CHOCOHOLISM, REDUX.At risk of sounding like a White Whiner, I simply cannot comprehend why it requires such great bodily, mental, and spiritual strength to find chocolate that satisfies me; I am not particularly particular--promise!--all I want is an ethically-traded, organic, seventy-plus-percent, independently-produced bar with few additives, which really isn't too much to ask for--in fact, for a good while I had what I coveted in Dagoba, a former favorite of mine due as much to the taste of the chocolate as to its name (homophonous as it is with my favorite Star Wars system), but they have since been bought out ...
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02.06.08Dark-rimmed glasses. Messy [black] hair. Mmmmm.I enjoy (I was going to say "love" but let's keep things realistic here) Chuck Klosterman for the same reasons that I like Project Runway and True Life: it's still pop-culture soma, but I can quite readily convince myself that they have more substance than their more populist analogues (Project Runway:Top Model::Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs:I Love the 80's1); I still wouldn't publicly announce2 enjoyment of Klosterman's fat-free cultural criticism--I mean, the index of ...Cocoa Puffs is little more than an alphabetized summary of Gen X trends (not that I am disparaging of Gen X; at least they comprise some ...
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01.25.08LOLBOOBIESSo I know it's completely trite - not to mention annoyingly ranty - but I find myself astounded by both the prevalence and nonchalance of some of the overt sexism people are willing to espouse these (pomo-)days; between the bullshit that Hillary has to put up with (which has actually made me feel empathetic towards her - guess I'm one of those easily-swayed overly-emotional lady-voters), along with the bullshit comments from random men I have to indulge (please don't "compliment" me on my body if I don't know you kthx), along with bullshit comments from my favorite community website asserting ...