The first, last, and only person to whom I showed the treacly Will.i.am (do not phunk with his heart) Yes. We. Can.¹ video had the most bizarre reaction: he felt neither unduly inspired nor unduly dismissive, he just kept asking me who the different celebrities were and twenty seconds before it ended shrugged, turned away, and declared, “I don’t recognize any of these people,” a sentiment at which I felt quite aghast²; I didn’t even consider that its validity as a political statement/art/campaigning tool/wev would be based on the relative percentages of A-, B- and C-listness of the people involved, but apparently he was not the only one and now I feel duly embarrassed to have turned down my snarkitude for a few moments by sharing it with someone, even if I presented it as an interesting cultural artifact as opposed to an effective call to the barracks³…*sigh*…meanwhile, I never noticed that The Onion A.V. shamelessly ripped off New York Magazine with their Tolerability Index, which, missing an axis, is but a bullshit bootleg version of The Approval Matrix⁴.